About

Michael J Pennington is a Writer and artist extraordinaire! His writing was blessed by gods from every religion and can impregnate anyone who reads it with ninja Jesus babies. When he is not spending twenty-six hours a day writing he and his forty-two adopted children like to help little old ladies throw cats into garbage fires, he personally gives every homeless person he meats a hand-job….Blah blah blah! I really hate self-promotional crap. I have absolutely no clue what I’m supposed to say here.

If you want the truth I just generally suck at life. In the year 2016, I lost my job, my wife and my place to live. Now I sleep on the floor while my kids sleep on the furniture around me. None of this really matters to me, the only two things that do matter to me is my writing, and making my kids lives a little better. I thought that my writing would help me do that, but it seems I lack the money and skills to break through the wall of bullshit that exists for a small-time author like myself to get our message out.

Now I see the problem in my head I have yet to unlock it. I know I need to sparkle, but sparkle takes money, and money takes sparkle.  Really the only way to succeed is to have money before sparkle and bribe your way to the top. Otherwise, you gotta pray the money gods take favor on you.

In short; I got nothing.  Writing is the only thing I want to do with my life right now, and in truth, it’s probably the only thing I really can do. I’ve always sucked at jobs, struggling to fit into place I just don’t fit it, and now it’s even harder after I’ve developed some pretty serious sleep issues. Issues I’m still trying to convince the doctors are real.

Now, this is a pity-fest, but I must assess the challenges if I am to move forward. Right now the plan is to fail. Then reassess and move forward. I just want to do it my way.